It was sad to also reflect upon missing the funeral of my elder sister, who passed away in Auckland, but we couldn't be there with her children and sent financial support and our love.
Returning would have been a logistical nightmare with skyrocketing airfares during the holidays, and seats for all four of us simultaneously would have been horrendous to find.
To keep it simple, I watched it live-streamed in a hotel room with an aunt before taking off to the beach for our family reunion activities. It definitely wasn't the same, but it was in keeping with what we could do to support from afar.
It also reminded me of the importance of community. I advised some of the upcoming matai who wanted to have titles and explained that in my 24 years of being a female matai (high chief), it was important to be in the community, be it a Samoan church, regular family get-togethers like meetings, funerals, weddings and attending together etc.
I found that the biggest mistake that overseas matai made was not being in a community/s, i.e. standing independent and expecting people to follow instructions when not in the community. My father continues to be a shining example to me of how to do things in community, and he has been sadly missed at this family reunion as many have reminded me of the care and love he dealt with people.
He was one to coordinate and plan events, he delegated but also walked alongside, and he had a knack for getting things done on a budget with great results and success. I think I picked up that same knack and have been given opportunities to demonstrate this...
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