"It Ends with us" movie - domestic violence is not okay!...

 

Had a great day yesterday spent with my elder two: firstly joining me at our local youth White Sunday morning service at church which brought back a lot of memories of my early forays into writing productions for Christmas, creative dances, choir singing etc.

The church is definitely a place that a lot of artists have been able to develop their talents through music production, singing, performing on a stage and acting including myself.

After having lunch together I had a nap after spending some time on my thesis. Into the evening we decided to go to watch a movie encouraged by my eldest. It was an interesting to watch with them as it tackled the topic of domestic violence that can be both physical and psychological. The movie was called "Ends with us".

After the movie we went out for a bite to eat and reflected on the movie in which a (spoiler alert!) spouse is beaten up by her husband and then her daughter goes through domestic violence as well with her new spouse. She has a daughter but then decides that she doesn't want that life to continue and divorces him unlike her mother who stayed in the abusive marriage until his death. 

It was an interesting movie as we women know lots of women who have gone through domestic violence whether it's physical or psychological and then find it hard to understand why they stay together. It's definitely something that's been on my radar as I've watched lots of friends and family go through it with different outcomes. We had a dinner conversation about it in my not ever wanting any of my children to go through life in domestic violence - physical and/or psychological.

I believe that safety for women is important (or men if the shoe is on the other foot - so to speak). Often it's hidden and the perpetrator tries to either pretend it never happened by not speaking about it  or cos it's a power play tries to normalize it and make it the victim's fault i.e in denial and not getting help. It can get real nasty, as I've seen and leaving the perpetrator is the only way forward to see if things can be resolved or to end it like in the movie.

The movies' main character showed resolve as it does take courage and consideration for the families involved but at the end "It ends with us" is a call to action for women (and men who are experiencing it) to end this type of violation that treats individuals as if they have less worth or value. To call out the perpetrators to get help through therapy or speaking a men's group to be accountable and never go back to normalizing domestic violence as it's not normal and it's not okay!...